150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother english islamic book pdf

150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother english islamic book pdf

ترجمة األستاذ : مبارك بن هادي المري

150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
I contemplated regarding those who were guided by Allah to
be dutiful to their mothers, and it became apparent to me
that their deeds were, in fact, not difficult, and that the effort
they exerted to achieve their mothers’ happiness was not
strenuous; and, this knowledge of how simple and easy
achieving their happiness was gives contentment to the soul.
I noticed that they possessed three characteristics –
intelligence, a smiling face and sincerity – which continually
supported them in performing their deeds and, as a result of
which, they attained success .
Brothers and sisters:
In this booklet I present my thoughts, and observations of
those around me who are dutiful to their mothers in order to
motivate people to follow their way. Here are 150 ways of
dutifulness; if you find them worthy to be implemented, then
do not hesitate in this. If not, then at least remember your
brother in your supplications.
In The Name of Allah, The Most Compassionate, The Most
Merciful

150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother

  1. Choose an appropriate gift for each occasion and
    present it in a happy way to oblige her to accept it.
  2. Open a bank account in which all of her children share
    paying a lump sum in order to cover her needs.
  3. Understand the different stages of life that your mother
    is going through, and treat her accordingly.
  4. Carefully select the appropriate words to use when
    talking to her to prevent her from feeling hurt; and, do
    not utter even one word or expression of disrespect.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  5. Ensure that she is the last one to see you off when you
    are determined to travel, and show her love and
    affection to her; and if she is in another country, then at
    least call her.
  6. Likewise, ensure she is the first one you meet when you
    return from a trip, and you should take into account
    telling her in advance of your arrival so as not to surprise
    her.
  7. Call her on a daily basis when you are abroad, even if
    only for a few seconds, since it is a source of happiness
    for her. Ease her, relax and relieve her concerns and
    keep her away from being sad.
  8. Take care to meet her on a daily basis if she lives in the
    same town as you, and try not to let the distractions of
    your daily life take you away from meeting her.
  9. If she does not live in the same country as you, then you
    must contact her on a daily basis, no matter what.
  10. The best way to get closer to her heart is to endear
    whom she likes; for example, as her children are the
    dearest people to her, then be gentle and helpful
    towards them.
  11. Kiss her head and hand when meeting her since it is a
    great way to make her happy, and it is a wonderful way
    to show your appreciation to her.
  12. Teach your children about the importance of the high
    status your mother holds, in both word and deed; be a
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
    good example for them when you deal with her in order
    for them to follow in your footsteps.
  13. Take care to fulfill her requests and fulfill her
    requirements at the required time – this will bring you
    closer to her and prevent her from becoming angry.
  14. Keeping your promises to her is a must, otherwise do not
    make promises to her.
  15. Attribute any success in your life to Allah, The Almighty,
    then to her, as it will make her happy and proud of you.
  16. Do not argue with her even if you are right; try to use
    the easiest way to convey your message or your opinion
    if there is a genuine interest; but if you are merely
    arguing your point, then give it up.
  17. Do not underestimate her opinion before your brothers,
    sisters or people whether she is present or absent,
    because it is evil speech the mentioning of which she
    would hate and it would be an act of disrespect towards
    her.
  18. Do not be disrespectful towards her nor belittle her in
    any way due to her unawareness of some aspects of life.
    Rather, you should try to positively correct her without
    harming her.
  19. Avoid laughing loudly, raising your voice when you are
    with her, looking angrily or miserable in her presence or
    mentioning what she dislikes.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  20. Make her the first one to know about the good news in
    your life, and reveal your secrets to her because it is a
    good means to capture her heart and make you very
    close to her.
  21. Take care of her health; if she is old, provide her with the
    required health equipment such as blood pressure
    monitors and diabetic equipment.
  22. Make a checkup program on a monthly basis to check on
    her health.
  23. As every age has different requirements, try to provide
    her with anything she needs accordingly.
  24. During her illness share her pain, and when she recovers,
    show your happiness and put your hand on the place of
    the pain and recite verses of (ruqyah).
  25. In the event that she becomes sick, give her hope that
    she will become better; and be careful of talking about
    the possible ill fate of her disease or of a similar
    condition, or any relevant bad news that may cause
    harm to her.
  26. In the event that she becomes sick, bring the doctor to
    her, or take her to the doctor if she is able to go, and
    explain to the doctor the importance of giving her hope
    about her case.
  27. Support her in keeping ties of kinship and visiting her
    friends, as this results in making her happy. Keeping ties
    of kinship is a means of elevating your rank in the sight
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
    of Allah. And, do not forget to buy her relatives and
    friends gifts.
  28. Provide her with a special box where you can put some
    items for children, such as chocolate, toys and gifts, so
    she can present them to her grandchildren when they
    visit her.
  29. When she goes on a long trip, try to call her every short
    while to check on her until she reaches her destination.
  30. Do not mention your painful or unpleasant incidents to
    her as it can be a source of sadness for her.
  31. Do not engage in marital disputes in front of her because
    this will disappoint her; so, part of being kind to her is to
    try to make her oblivious to this nuisance.
  32. Neither praise your wife too much in the presence of
    your mother, nor tell her about your life with your wife
    or what you always give to your spouse as a gift; try to
    maintain a balanced relationship between them.
  33. Do not reveal detailed information about your
    relationship with your mother to your wife. Exalt the
    status of your mother and do not belittle her.
    Strengthen the relationship between your mother and
    your wife.
  34. Avoid judging between your parents in their arguments.
    You need not do so, be neutral outwardly, and work on
    advising and guiding covertly.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  35. Do not criticize her appearance, choices, mood, style or
    her way of dealing with people; if you become
    concerned that people would notice, then advise her
    gently.
  36. Maintain a strong relationship with your siblings. And, if
    there are no disagreements, this should not be in the
    sight or earshot of your mother as it results in grief and
    misery for her.
  37. Whatever the circumstances of your parent’s marital
    relationship, don’t support your father in marrying
    another wife; however, if you deem it necessary to
    support him to re-marry, then keep your support for this
    as a secret .
  38. Teach her about the religion wisely and in a beautiful
    way of preaching, either by giving her cassettes, CDs or
    taking her to associate with religious companions,
    attending religious study seminars, and beneficial
    religious lectures.
  39. You should help her in attending the sessions of dhikr by
    transporting her to that place and providing her with the
    schedule pertaining to these sessions.
  40. The best time to be dutiful to your parents is during
    worship. For example, in pilgrimage be completely
    subservient to her, be extremely kind to her and enjoy
    serving her.
  41. Apologize to her on behalf of your siblings whenever
    they do something to upset her, and praise her for the
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
    way she brought them up. Anytime something like this
    happens, try to explain that it is merely the whisperings
    of the devil.
  42. Do not exaggerate the mistakes and faults committed
    against her by her relatives, friends, or her children, but
    reduce the effect of these mistakes as this minimizes her
    pain and it keeps the status of her beloved relatives and
    friends.
  43. Do not tell her about sad news or terrifying catastrophes
    without preparing her for the bad news in a way to
    minimize the impact. Also, remind her about the reward
    of patience.
  44. Naturally, women, regardless of their age, love
    emotional and sentimental words, so do not hesitate to
    give her the best of what you can in this respect.
  45. Do not make her feel that she has grown old or is unable
    to perform her domestic duties, but inspire her by saying
    the words that enhance her self-confidence.
  46. Do not deprive her of anything loved by women, even if
    she is old, such as perfumes, cosmetics or evening
    gowns, and help her to rejuvenate her youth.
  47. if your father has more than one wife and they have a
    disagreement with your mother, don’t praise their
    decision or support their opinion at the expense of hers;
    avoid being judgmental or talking in this regard.
  48. Do not show a lot of appreciation in your mother’s
    presence concerning the way other people raise their
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
    children because doing so shows that you are
    dissatisfied about the way she raised you.
  49. When she talks, pay full attention and focus your heart
    and sight on her; smile at her when she tells jokes, and
    react appropriately in a sad situation.
  50. Meet her smiling, joke with her respectfully, caress her
    gently. Do not be a burden on her, and in difficult
    situation be serious, concerned and alert.
  51. Inform her about any updates surrounding her in this
    world and narrate to her the best of stories. Tell her
    what makes her happy because mothers desire
    conversing with their children.
  52. Always praise her for your good upbringing, and be
    grateful to her for her hard efforts. There is nothing
    easier than saying thank you.
  53. Inform her that you greatly desire for her to live a happy
    life, and that she is well pleased with you, and that you
    want to be the source of her happiness.
  54. If her parents are alive do not be lazy to support her in
    being dutiful to them, and if they are dead make more
    charity and pray for them.
  55. Make endowment for her resulting in increasing her
    rewards in the hereafter such as contributing to build
    mosques, sponsoring orphans or memorisers of the
    Qur’an, helping the poor and needy etc.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  56. When she mentions any of her wishes or anything she
    desires, do not wait until she requests it from you but
    take the initiative and help her achieve her wishes as
    much as you can.
  57. Give her the most priority of anything over your work,
    and even your children and your wife.
  58. Be generous to her in your house, ask her to visit you
    very frequently and persuade her to sleep in your house
    – these things all change her life .
  59. Take her with you on a journey with your children, your
    brother and sisters, and seek the way that penetrates
    the happiness into her heart as it refreshes her in life.
  60. From time to time take her with whom you love to have
    a meal in a luxurious restaurant, but note that this type
    of activity will not suit every age group. If she rejects,
    then try to convince her.
  61. Visiting malls or big markets might make her happy; so,
    why don’t you try to have her achieve that.
  62. Present her a gift in order for her to give it to your
    father, which is righteousness to your parents.
  63. Being grateful and kind to your father is something that
    will make her proud of you.
  64. Your appreciation of her treatment and management of
    her house as well as her services to her husband / your
    father motivates her, raises her spirit and enhances her
    confidence.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  65. Girls are generally closer to mothers than boys, the girl
    should keep her secrets, and reveal their secrets to her,
    and try to understand her thoughts and treat her as if
    she is a friend of theirs.
  66. Mothers need males more than girls in difficult
    conditions; so, they must support her in hardship and be
    with her.
  67. Be gentle with your sisters, present them gifts and treat
    them nicely because as it will make your mother happy
    as any mother loves her daughters to be treated gently.
  68. Do not be shy of any action taken by your mother that
    suits her age and be reasonable to the surroundings, be
    proud of her, in whatever she does.
  69. Teach your children how to be nice with her, kissing her
    head, and hand; send with them gifts on different
    occasions.
  70. Hold her hand when she is old, help her to put on her
    shoes, guide her to her way, walk her to the hospital and
    to her errands as you are the most responsible for her.
  71. Make an award for whoever treats her well from your
    children, for who comes first in serving her or for who
    creates a new way to be dutiful.
  72. Naturally, mothers take care of her house, so help her in
    making her house to be in the best condition, for
    example by maintaining and following the process of its
    development periodically.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  73. The bedroom has a special place in the heart of the
    mother, so do your best to present her with appropriate
    gifts or give her the chance to choose what fits her in
    this regard as well as for the guestroom.
  74. Be dutiful to her relatives and help her in this respect,
    try to link between them by helping her visit them, and
    remind her to call and buy them gifts.
  75. If she fancies a certain hobby, try to dedicate some of
    your time for her to enjoy it and provide her with what
    she needs in this regard, and familiarize her with
    everything new in her world.
  76. Occupy her in your hobbies; provide her with a special
    treatment by writing her a poem if you are a poet; if you
    are a writer, write her an article or tweet.
  77. In some societies women like to be referred to as
    “mother of any name of her grandchildren” ex. Mother
    of Mohammed or Nassere.c.t; but due to the fact that
    she doesn’t want to interfere into her son’s business, she
    usually doesn’t want to show that ; so, honor her with
    giving her what she desires.
  78. When she and your family go in your car, give her the
    priority of sitting her first and the on the most
    comfortable position. When you get in and out, make
    sure that she is before you unless the matter requires
    that.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  79. Don’t speak rudely, roughly or in a way that does not
    compliment her high status. Use the most beautiful
    words with her.
  80. Make a contest between children on who presents the
    best gift to their mother, which enhances her status in
    their hearts and motivate them to perform good deeds.
  81. You should try constantly to seek the accepted
    supplications time such as the last third of night, Friday
    and during prostration, then pray for her.
  82. Inform your mother about how the guests are happy
    about what she offered them in the banquets or any
    kind of invitation, because it refreshes her.
  83. The time dedicated to her should be enough and no
    matter what you should spend it with her without any
    interruption on account of phone calls, reading
    newspaper or magazines.
  84. Girls should get the mother to know their friend and
    should not be embarrassed from her or tell her not to do
    a certain action under in any form.
  85. Be proud of her at any place and time, and she must be
    your first priority.
  86. Narrate some of the stories of righteousness and send
    her some clips on this subject; which enjoys them.
  87. Ask her to pray for you that God helps you to be dutiful
    to her, which proves to her your interest to be so.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  88. Ask her always to be satisfied with you as it indicates its
    importance for you.
  89. Always take the initiative and act before everybody in
    being dutiful. Always create new ways of dutifulness,
    that result in rewarding you and you will have the same
    reward for those who implement this without deducting
    their reward .
  90. Don’t raise your voice in her presence; be humble and
    lenient when requesting or serving her and the best
    words while serving her .
  91. If you live in the same town where your mother lives ,
    try to live near her as much as you can as it helps
    keeping ties of kinship solid and it simplify the way for
    you to act piously.
  92. If you work in another city, take into account visiting her
    at any opportunity, and don’t be late since she has
    patience waiting for you and she will not complain when
    she needs to be patient with his affairs..
  93. It is not enough to visit her alone but you should take
    your family with you. Your wife and children until an
    appropriate relationship for her is formed between her
    and your family.
  94. Avoid your ego and your desires, give the preference of
    your mother over yourself, and request her to accept
    that; as fulfilling her desire is part of the perfection of
    dutifulness.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  95. Sit with yourself and review your deeds; how good your
    performance was towards your mother? Whether you
    were satisfactory or not or still needing more to reach
    her satisfaction .
  96. Be sure that whatever you did to your parents, it will
    return back to you; if you are dutiful, your children will
    be so, and if it is the other way around, you will
    experience the same. So, work on achieving their
    satisfaction, then you will be happy in this life and in the
    hereafter.
  97. In the event that she is sick, attend to her and bring who
    you want to serve her.
  98. Do not neglect praising her taste in the presence of all,
    in terms of buying clothes, or her appearance etc .
  99. Narrate to her your actions of your journeys, during
    which you can show her the pictures of you and your
    friends; all that will result in her praying for you, which is
    the higher purpose.
  100. Receive her concerns in a welcoming manner, and
    accept her remarks and execute her instructions humbly .
  101. Consult her and take her advice.
  102. When you are sitting with her, sit in a manner that suits
    her status.
  103. During the meal, follow the manners of eating with her;
    prefer her over yourself by giving her what she likes of
    foods and drinks.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  104. Understand her psychological state of mind and the way
    she lives treat her accordingly. Try to know her
    tendencies and provide her with more than what she
    deserves.
  105. The daughters must not be busy with their married
    lives until it causes dilemmas with care of her mother ;
    her attribution to her family must not affect her
    dutifulness to her mother, since the daughter has a
    special position with her mother.
  106. Some of the mother’s private matters cannot be known
    by her sons; so, preferably the daughter should be alert
    in this regard and not forget about her mother.
  107. During the visit to your family, don’t let your children
    spoil or ruin her house. As a result, mother will be
    burdened with fixing them.
  108. If your children ruin some of your mother’s house
    properties, you must fix the damages and substitute it
    with something better.
  109. Normally the patient state of mind changes; so, it is
    better to visit them during their sickness provided that
    we should be alert to prevent her from the children
    making noise.
  110. With the increase of the number of the children visiting,
    it is preferable to organize a visiting schedule because
    bringing all children at once on the same day is not
    necessary.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  111. It is worth those having a lot of children to take them to
    a reasonable place where the mother cannot be
    annoyed by their noise such as: a park, a spacious place
    where she can relax
  112. To make a charity work is a suitable act presented by
    children as a gift and reciprocity of gratefulness to the
    mother.
  113. Each one of the children is talented in a certain activity
    for example: some of them are hard workers, some are
    sociable etc.. Try to be dutiful in that which you are
    gifted.
  114. It is preferable that each son should know his
    characteristics that are loved by his mother, and try to
    use them.
  115. If you want to capture your mother’s heart, never stop
    visiting her. A mother never tires of seeing her children..
  116. Provide her with modern communication devices; teach
    her how to use them, how she can utilize them and the
    bill should be paid by you.
  117. If the mother possesses a cellular phone, send her the
    best wishes as it remains in her heart and increases love.
  118. If the mother is old, you may wrap a set of gifts in order
    to give them to her friends and acquaintances .
  119. When calling your mother, do not be in a hurry, but slow
    down and listen to her until you know her needs, and do
    not hang up before she does.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  120. In the presence of her you should be well-behaved
    without raising our voice, creating controversies, quarrel
    or mentioning anything that she is reluctant to answer.
  121. When coming from a trip, present her with a gift from
    the country where you came from, which will remain in
    her memory about your trip and an expression of your
    happiness upon seeing her .
  122. The place where your mother was brought up as well as
    the place of the early days of her marriage have a special
    place in her heart, why don’t you take her to enjoy
    remembering those unforgettable places.
  123. Teaching children about the virtue of dutifulness,
    inspiring them to compete over being the best in this
    respect can be a source of happiness for them. In
    addition, they will do good deeds for you in the future .
  124. If your parents got divorced, do not criticize any one of
    them with anything they hate .
  125. In case of any disputes within the family, offer
    functional solutions in a diplomatic manner to save the
    ship from sinking; in order to abate any concerns and to
    gladden the mother .
  126. If your mother gets married to another husband other
    than your father , respect and be generous to him ;
    present her gifts on different occasions as it sets her
    heart at peace .
  127. If your mother is a wife to somebody else, respect him,
    consult him in some of your issues and take his advice.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  128. Call those who are close to your mother’s heart from
    your own phone, and make it easy for her to contact and
    visit them.
  129. When she gets old, keep being with her, be affectionate
    towards her, hold her hand, and orientate her, give her a
    hand, provide her with what she needs and never leave
    her without .
  130. If her opinion was contrary to yours, don’t be stubborn,
    but be easy going and pay her compliments, even if she
    was wrong unless it is disobedience to the Creator.
  131. If she is one of those follower of magazines, papers or
    any stuff relevant to the library, then help her to
    participate in that activity as a gift .
  132. Always give her money and don’t wait for her to ask you,
    as some mothers do not want to embarrass their
    children by doing so.
  133. If you bought her needs or fulfill her requirements, don’t
    take back the value of that by asking for money; make it
    as a gift for her .
  134. Open a bank account for her where you should put some
    money every so often; teach her how to use the ATM
    machine which means that you are making her feel
    secure .
  135. If you commit a mistake against her, rush to apologize;
    and send the best friend of her as a mediator to accept
    your apology; in addition, send her a gift for forgiveness.
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  136. When she gets old, don’t call her by the names that
    make her feels aged. Calling her grandmother or any
    hints at age may annoy her.
  137. If you observe any misbehavior in her marital life, don’t
    advise her directly; but, try to clarify the point without
    hurting her feelings and remind her about her husband’s
    rights.
  138. try always to update yourself with a new act of
    righteousness to her; think about the condition of dutiful
    people surrounding you and try to utilize their ideas; add
    some features on that and do it for your mother.
  139. Do not limit your self at a certain level of the
    righteousness, but put into consideration that any deeds
    you provide her is less than entitlements; in addition,
    always find ways to make your dutifulness more perfect,
    and your deeds much better.
  140. Whatever her actions, ideas or opinions, don’t obviously
    belittle them; but try to be lenient and complimenting of
    the action .
  141. Do not interrupt her or disregard her by not paying
    attention during her conversation. Do not converse or
    listen to others when she is talking to you but give her
    your full attention.
  142. Try to increase your Knowledge with regards to the
    virtue of dutifulness and the biographies of righteous
    people, as it develops your inspiration .
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  143. If you see a person afflicted with impiety, then say “All
    praise and thanks are due to ALLAH who restored me to
    health from that which He afflicted many people with
    and this is rather a protection for you from the evil of
    mocking.
  144. During her visit with you , do not turn your back to her
    or away from your attention; maintain that you should
    be the nearest person to her and the fastest one of
    serving her.
  145. When she wants to walk, bring her shoes or slippers and
    put them on her feet; walk with her side by side holding
    her hand; always follow her with your sight and heart .
  146. Do not be the last one to know her news, the last one
    congratulating her or console her during her trials., take
    the initiative in this respect as it reflects on how
    conscientious you are.
  147. In the event she is mad at you, do not respond to her or
    justify your stance in the situation at once. If you are
    wrong, extend your apology and ask her for forgiveness .
  148. Some Mothers are quick tempered; so, be patient,
    tolerant and try to accommodate her attitude; ask God
    to preserve her and you will be rewarded for your
    patience .
  149. Write on a piece of paper her favorite things; write each
    in a way by which you reach her heart and become
    dutiful .
    150 Ways To Be Dutiful To Your Mother
  150. Contemplate and think of those who have lost their
    mother, and how they missed the opportunity to gain
    rewards through being dutiful; so, why don’t we make
    use of this means as the door is still opened.
  151. When she is sick, cancel your trips and appointments
    and focus on her so she gets better upon the presence of
    her children.